"Hi Bunny..
I know that we have had our differences, but I still love you. Is it enough to bring you back? I know that I broke your heart when I called it off, I know that you have been hurting, I know that it has been rough. Sorry will never be enough.. Nothing will ever be enough.
So many dreams , plans , ambitions , all laid to waste. I don't know what to say. Everything reminds me of you. I am trying to keep myself busy, just so that I can push those memories out of my mind but you seem to have left a piece of you everywhere in my being.
People say that moving on is what I must keep focusing on, but the truth is that so many parts of me don't want to move on, they always want to keep remembering you, no matter wherever you are.
It is scary out there, in the real world, for a creature of imagination that I am. I am anxious, frightened, purplexed about love. You are my one & only. I don't know if I will find someone like you ever again. I know as I say all this, you will think that if you are worth so much to me then why did I call it off, throw away years of love, promises, fantasies....
I don't know what to say Bunny, somewhere down the line, I had realised that I couldn't make you happy, that you were always unhappy, worried with me, also that a girl like me would not have been a perfect fit in your family. Your family is important to you and it would tear me apart to see that you are troubled and frustrated cause I am unable to adjust in the family. I did think that we could get back, sort it out, give it another try, but our indifferences, impatience, angry & hurt got in the way.
Maybe a huge part of you will always hate me, remember me as a vile human who brought so much sorrow in your life. It is a small price to pay for your happiness. I did say that if I had to marry it is going to be you and only you, no one else. I think I am going to continue to do that with whatever time I have left, for it is the only promise that I can keep forever. I have loved you and always will, Bunny, my forever. Lastly, don't you ever forget that you are a good person. I have meaning to tell you all this, before I leave, to search for you in my next life. Take care, stay happy and wish me luck Bunny."
"That's it, I think. Please make sure he gets it, reads it. I always wanted to say all this to him, but as you know time hasn't quite been on my side." said a weak and frail looking Nemo as she layed on the hospital bed with eyes filled with tears.
I quickly scribbled all that she had to say on the diary and promised her that I will personally make sure the Bunny reads the message hoping that he will visit her before she breathes her last breath , while the cancer consumes her.
Nemo was a beautiful looking twenty seven year old woman who recently was diagnosed with stage four lukaemia and was given three months to live. Death is unpredictable, scary, sad... But nursing someone who about is about to die is the toughest, the most painful of all. I hope she goes away peacefully, that she finds her Bunny in the next life.
muffin978 